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Archive for the ‘Silliness’


Gold, Swimming Pools and Prof Brian Cox 1

Posted on March 16, 2011 by noncon
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So Brian Cox (that’s PROF Brian Cox, not Brian Cox the actor) says all the gold ever mined in the world wouldn’t fill three Olympic sized swimming pools. At first, that seemed unbelieveable, but when you think about it, olympic sized swimming pools are bloody huge!

But some people will just tweet the first thing that pops into their heads and say someone’s talking rubbish, without checking the facts first:

burt_dawg: @ProfBrianCox all the gold ever being mined fitting into 3 swimming pools is surely rubbish?! how do you explain wedding rings/gold bars!

ProfBrianCox: @burt_dawg Why not look it up rather than simply express an opinion – how about Google?

Also, when you think about it; most stuff made out of gold is tiny.

If you were to melt it all, it would be tinier still.

Most gold is not pure gold, which is determined by how many carrots, sorry carats.

Wonder how many carrots would fit into three olympic sized swimming pools? And what would the difference be if you were to grate or mash the carrots, then condense them with three giant condensers?….

My Chair Wants To Say Something 0

Posted on January 16, 2011 by noncon
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3D zeros

This is what I found when I looked at my screen a few mintues ago. I was editing a word document and got up to check a paper document filed away, leaving the arm of  my chair apparently on the zero key!

I was only away a few seconds, but this was the number of zeros it had typed before I moved the chair away from the keyboard. I didn’t count them before deleting it (which I could have done easily in Word’s tools), so you’ll have to count them yourself. I wonder if my chair was trying to tell me something; like how many people laugh at my jokes, or how many non$p*mming people will visit the site this week, or how much money I’m gonna make if my musical ever gets made.

What you might find disturbing though is; I found that if you stare at the image for a few seconds (click to zoom), it has the optical illusion of being in 3D. Seriously. Some whole vertical strips appear to be nearer to you than others, then when you look again, different rows of zeros are now in front. And then there’s the way the ones in the middle appear bigger than the rest… This is where a person with ADHD can waste a lot of time…

Accidents Don’t Exist According to UK Police 1

Posted on November 25, 2010 by noncon
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A few years ago, the British police decided to change the term RTA (Road Traffic Accident) to RTC (Road Traffic Collision).

 

accidentTwo characters on this police forum discussing this topic both feel that the police were right to drop the word accident, including the guy who left the last comment, saying;

“Neither of your scenarios were accidents as there were reasons for both incidents.”

Well, sorry to break it to you, but there is a reason for everything, so you are actually saying there is no such thing as an accident. Yes, there is a reason for every single thing that happens in the universe. Just because you don’t know the reason, doesn’t mean there isn’t one.

“My kids are naughty for no reason” – No, they’re unhappy and need positive attention.

“He gets angry for no reason” – No, he has depression or autistic spectrum disorder (includes dyslexia).

“What Causes Bruising for No Reason?” – An oxymoron if ever there was one. If there’s a cause, then there’s a reason.

“He shot the real estate agent for no reason” -  Another oxymoron ;-)

“The car in front careered out of control for no reason” – The car in front is a Toyota (with a dodgy computer, that was eventually recalled after several people died).

An Accident does NOT imply that no-one was to blame. An accident means that its cause was not deliberate. Most accidents are someone’s fault.

“My three year old daughter had an accident” – Your fault. You never took her to the loo.

“He broke a glass vase by accident” – His fault. He was carrying too many boxes and couldn’t see where he was going. Also Mother’s fault for putting the expensive vase where it could be knocked over.

“We’re not covered for accidental damage” – Your fault. You got the cheapest roofer in the yellow pages, resulting in roof slates falling on your car.

 

So folks, you can go ahead and scrub the word Accident from your dictionary, because according to “Sub-seven” (is that his IQ?), for something to be an accident, it has to have happened for no reason at all.

What is more likely to be the actual reason the police dropped the word “accident”, is that nowadays there are a lot more deliberate road collisions, so of course they are not accidents. They are criminal acts designed to claim thousands on the other driver’s insurance. And as it is not always obvious straight away which are the genuine accidents and which are the deliberate collisions, they are all now refered to as “collisions”.

Either that is what Sub-seven meant and he didn’t explain it properly, or he doesn’t understand why they dropped the word “accident” himself.

 



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